Fun Food Friday: The Wonders of Bulk Barn

Today is, as you know, Fun Food Friday! Today, I am going to talk about one of the most amazing places to get food. I'm pretty sure it's just Canadian, so for all you non-Canadian readers out there, I'm very sorry that you have to miss out on the wonder that is Bulk Barn.

I'm sure there are other versions of this in other countries so I guess maybe you're not missing out after all. I sure hope not because it is actually amazing.

You walk in and at the front they have their seasonal candy (right now it's all Mini Eggs and jelly beans and Easter candy), and then once you've worked your way through there, you get to the aisles. Then you have your baking supplies (ignore them), and you have nuts (keep on walking) and you have juice and stuff (almost there) and finally you arrive at candy. This is where you've been headed all along, you just walk up and down the other aisles quickly to make it look like you're browsing and - oh! Look you just happened to stumble upon candy! Or you can just make a beeline for the candy. That's usually what I do.

The hard part is deciding what you want. I almost always get the Lego blocks. It's candy and it's a toy... what more could you want? But there are so many options. Always make sure you have a game plan when you go in there though, otherwise you're going to be coming out of there with like 16 bags of candy and a very empty wallet. Sure, it'll seem like a good idea at the time, but later you'll probably feel really sick and gross, and you might regret it. Trust me, I know this from experience.

And although I've never personally done it, I'm sure it is a good place for when you need to get baking supplies or if you have a desperate need for lots and lots of nuts. They have stuff like cookies too, which is cool. Oh, and cereal. We all know how much I love cereal.

What do you guys think? Sounds magical, huh? I'm just glad the nearest one to me is half an hour away, or I would be way more broke than I already am.

Not a very nice night.

You know what is the worst. You're in deep sleep, probably having the best fucking dream you may ever have. You haven't been asleep for long yet. And then suddenly, your bladder turns against you. You have never had to pee so bad in your life. You can't even contemplate holding it in for any longer.

So you stumble to the bathroom, bumping into walls, doors and railings on your way there. It has never been such a journey before. But things are different. You have never needed sleep as much as you did now.

Anyways, we'll skip all the bathroom stuff, cause really, we all know what happens and nobody really likes reading about it. So anyways, still bleary eyed and a little blind, you stumble back to your bedroom. You lie back in bed and you close your eyes, ready for sweet sweet slumber to take you over.

But something happens. Actually, not quite. What really happens is: nothing. You aren't falling asleep. You roll over and see if getting more comfortable helps. You lie that way awhile before trying a different position. Your teddy bear (not that I sleep with one, pshh) gets shifted from in your arms, to under your head, to the other side of the bed and back into your arms again.

You lie there for hours. Time passes slowly and you check the time compulsively. You sigh and your growl and you beat your head with your hands hoping a small concussion will put you out. But nothing works. So then you get mad, and the more mad you get, the more awake you get, and the more awake you get the more mad you get. Until you enivitably give up. You are not getting back to sleep.

And this is why I am up at 7:30 in the morning writing a blog. Because 4AM is a terrible time to have to pee. And the two hours sleep I got before that is the reason that this post is a little weird and kinda terrible.

Time to get ready for school now...

Weird Word Wednesday!!

Flawed.

Just say it.

"Flod"

How weird is that? Right?? I mean, your vowel sounds go all long and you can't even help it.

Point #1:
The word "odd" is right there in the pronunciation of the word. I mean, I shouldn't even have to make any more arguments as to why this qualifies for a Weird Word Wednesday post.

Point #2:
If the sound of the word isn't enough to get you thinking about this word, there's the meaning. Imperfect. Less than adequate. Unacceptable. Nobody wants anything about who they are or what they've done to be described as "flawed" do they?

Point #3:
Say the word really slowly, and I mean REALLY slowly. Really take a second to try out each letter in the word as you say it. First you get the scrape of your teeth against your lips with the F. Next you have to press your tongue against the roof of your mouth for the L. For the AWE your face goes all fish-lipped and if you're still doing it now I'm sure you look ridiculous. Finally is the D, where you have to reign in your fish lips and bounce your tongue off the roof of your mouth really quickly.

I'm sure I've just ruined pronunciation and enunciation for you forever, but really. What is with this word? The letters take over your whole mouth, leaving you with this sense that you didn't even say a real word. How bizarre is that?

If you guys have any suggestions about weird words that you'd like us to talk about leave some comments below!!

Attention span? What's that?

Okay, so in the first post of this blog (which you can find here) we mentioned a few of the wonderous ways that proved you were socially awkward. One of these ways was wondering if you have ADD, ADHD or OCD.

Acronyms are pretty key to social awkwardness. See: LOL.

Now as most of you know, ADD stands for attention defecit disorder, ADHD stands for Attention Defecit Hyperactivity Disorder and OCD stands for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Now I don't know much about any of these disorders, so that puts me in the perfect position to self-diagnose. Especially when I have Google at hand and a most probable case of being a hypochondriac (it sounds much cooler than it actually is). So I can pretty much be sure that my diagnosis will be entirely accurate.

I have reason to believe I must have ADD or ADHD. I can not focus on anything for too long. In the amount of time it has taken me to write this much, I have checked Tumblr several times. The only reason I am really writing this is I'm have a case of I-Can't-Get-The-Fuck-To-Sleeps and there's really not much else to do at 3AM.

My attention span is to the point where I can't read long blocks of texts anymore. Even if I want to. I can't keep a conversation going for very long. I tend to change topics. Those who know me well, know I digress a lot. It makes for interesting conversations. I also zone out if I have to listen to anyone for any amount of time without being really interactive with them. Ie Lectures. Even when I like my lectures, I realize part way through my professor's voice has become that of adults from Charlie Brown.

Bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah bwah

I thought this would be more interesting and hilarious.

So what happens when you have an attention span like mine? Really awkward conversations. There tends to be a lot of,

"So did you do something about it?"
"Yes. That is exactly what I just said, 45 seconds ago."
"Oh. Sorry, I tuned out about halfway through what you were saying."
"Wow. Nice. Well anyways, as I was saying--- Are you listening?"
"What? Yeah. Yeah, of course."

I'm really not, it's just really impolite to say no and walk away to whatever was distracting me from the corner of my eye.

I also get a lot of conversations like this:

Me: So I was really pissed off and I said to him-- Oh there's a squirrel over there it's so cute!
Friend: You said that to him?
Me: To who?

It can be a little frustrating at times.

So for those of you that actually have a medically diagnosed case of ADD or ADHD, what do you think my diagnosis is? Do I have it, or am I just dumb?

Moustache Envy

It seems to be an ever increasing trend for lady-folk to want facial hair, or at least for them to be envious of the ability that most men have to grow it. I say most because lets face it, most white guys in their teens can't grow more than a greasy teen 'stache. Sorry guys, it's just the truth. But back to the point. Why are girls so obsessed with this lately?

For me it's because you can do such amazing things with it. I mean, have you seen some of those pictures of men with sculpted beards?? I mean just look at this guy:

He's like "I don't care about what you have to say, I have an epic fucking beard right here"

Fantastic. Just top notch.

As Mariah talked about in other Moustache Monday posts, you can make your own facial hair of of just about anything. When we were at school we made so many moustaches out of tape, and even paper towel rolls as you can see here...

But really it's just not the same. You can shape a moustache out of tape if you really have no other choice but in the end I will never feel quite like I have a beard or a moustache. I will always have moustache envy.

What do you guys think? Ladies, do you wish you could grow facial hair of your own? Guys, what are your thoughts on facial hair? Do you want more or is it just plain annoying? Tell me things!

We all do it... Don't lie

Yes, there's a deep dark secret we all share. Something we fear other people knowing or finding out. But I think it's time we break free of these earthly bonds... Time to let it all out. Yes. I'm talking about...

Our secret desire for bad TV.

We all have at least one show that we know is awful and terrible, but we still secretly sneak into the family room to watch it when no one is looking.

For some it's reality television, for others it's MTV originals. For some it is children's shows. By this I'm referring to the new stuff that is on nowadays, not the awesome stuff that bombarded our young impressionable minds in our formative years. That stuff I am never ashamed of.

I don't know what it is, but there is an entertainment factor in the awful. Is that not the same reason that we watch really bad movies? We sit there and we laugh at them and point out plot holes and bad character development, but in the end, we're still watching them. We're still giving it the acknowledgment of its existence.

This is nothing to be ashamed of. What is important is that we don't pay them any money. They can have their ratings, but do not buy into the franchise. We should really raise our standards, so maybe eventually we'll just bury our guilty pleasures by not allowing them to exist too long.

Do not buy Jersey Shore spray tan (cause I'm sure that exists somewhere). Do not get Hannah Montana socks! Even if you get to step on her face whenever you wear them. Just do not buy into the franchise. 

But do not let this happen to good shows. Make sure they stay on until they've worn out their welcome.

But most of all, get your friends together and watch it together. What is better than sitting with friends with a bowl of popcorn and belting out whole hearted mockery at a dumb character who really would not survive in high school because, seriously, who wouldn't beat up that kid?

An Ode to Music

For those of you who know me, you know that music is such a huge part of my life. You know how when I talk about it in depth I usually end up saying a lot of unfinished sentences. i.e. "It's just so... It makes me feel so... I just... ughhh" etc. Music is probably my greatest love of all, and yes, I get stupidly romantic about it. I cannot express the depth of what music makes me feel, and I end up with lots of unfinished sentences and lots of looks from people as they try to figure out why I'm talking about music like some people talk about their significant other. Ever heard that song that goes "Music is my boyfriend"?

Here is why I think music is so important. It is so fundamental to human nature. I mean, think about it. Even if you aren't listening to a song there are so many ways that music relates to what is happening. For example, your heart beat. It is (hopefully) a constant rhythm that you don't even think about unless you've just completed some sort of strenuous activity and it's pounding like crazy. But it's this omnipresent source of rhythm and something completely steady. There is music in the way peoples' voices blend together when you're in a crowded place, and whether it shows up in melodies and harmonies, or dissonance, it's there.

And then there's actual music. It is so personal for every person. There are so many different styles and feelings. Music evokes emotions, it can set a mood, or change the mood you are in at the time. It can help you release your anger or your sadness, it can help you celebrate when you're excited, and it definitely can help motivate you when you're working out (I'm assuming this, I wouldn't actually know...) or when you need to clean. Music can energize you or calm you, comfort you or take you to a different place completely. All of this from a few notes strung together. Isn't that amazing? I could go on and on, but I think that gives you an idea.

Finally, there's playing music yourself. I myself don't play that many instruments, I've only really played 3 with any sort of commitment. I took piano for 10 years, and flute for 4. I've just started cello this year, and I played clarinet for about a month last year just for fun. Each of these instruments has a different effect on me. Piano I always resented because of the way I had to learn, and having to practice. I haven't actually played in a while because of that very reason. Flute I don't always like admitting to because it is seen as a very girly instrument and that's not me. It also has the potential to be very high pitched and squeaky which is not too pleasing to the ear, let me tell you. But I actually love the flute. It can be so pretty at times, especially in the lower register. Clarinet was fun, but it was a lot different than flute. I didn't really commit to clarinet, but if I had the chance to play it again, I would. And then there's cello. I find cello to be an absolutely beautiful instrument. It has such a deep timbre, and everything about playing it is so intimate. There is something very human about the cello, and as new and different as it is to me, I have fallen in love with it completely. I feel so much playing music. I get completely lost in it, and there is nothing that compares to it. You have the power to create something or at least recreate something, putting yourself into it completely. There is so much freedom and beauty in playing music. Again, very difficult for me to explain it in a way that does it justice. Unless you actually play music, you don't know what it's like.

This has been a very different blog post from those previous, and I hope I didn't freak you out too much with all of this. But I honestly do believe that music is one of the most important parts of life, and I hope you do too. I'm sure I will revisit this topic a few times in the future, so if you connected with any of this, there will be more! And now comes the audience participation section! What instruments do you guys play? What kind of music do you listen to? Should I stop talking about how music makes me feel and just get some cats or something? Leave me comments to read please! Mariah is gone and I need something to keep me occupied until she gets back!!